Diary of a Recovering Academic: Teaching Independence to Children

Since my blog now seems to have taken on 3 distinct strands (life beyond academia, aging parents, and raising kids as a single parent), I am taking the opportunity to shift gears and talk about work today. Our school is celebrating our five-year anniversary this year. We started with only 42 children and as of this spring we have 111 children. That's a remarkable feat considering we've survived an economic slump and are located in a mostly rural area 30 miles south of Miami.

Our children are wonderful and while I wasn't sure what life would be like after I took that leap off away from a college professorship, I find being in a partnership and owning our own business is really rewarding. This job, in particular, has me surrounded with children 8+ hours a day and so far that piece has (mostly) been a lot of fun and energizing.

And yes, I have had more than one child call me mom. Usually they call me Miss Dr. Burns because they don't know where the Dr. part goes and apparently all women are Miss in a preschooler's eyes. Usually by second or third grade they get the hang of it or one of the other children corrects them.

We are a Montessori school and that provides so many advantages over a traditional school. Children are encouraged to work and explore on their own. They learn by doing, not by just reading about it. There's a lot of hand's on experience in a Montessori classroom. There's also an amazingly quiet classroom environment for all this independent or small group work going on. Montessori education teaches children to be responsible young people who respect each other and the environment (it's a very socially and environmentally conscience system). For me and my children, it's the by far the best way.

Independence is hard for some parents. They want to control everything the child hears, sees, and experiences. Often they want to do everything for the child to the point that they carry backpacks, cut up food well beyond the age that it's necessary, pick out clothing, etc. All that does is make the child want to rebel. Children need boundaries, but they also need responsibilities. Doing everything for a child turns them into a disliked, spoiled brat (just like Veruca Salt in Charlie and Chocolate Factory). Even as preschoolers there are chores children can do.